I'm in a situation where I really am torn about what's going on. I found an old friend a couple of weeks ago, and I was really hoping to catch up, and renew a friendship that I have missed for almost 10 years. Things ended in a not so wonderful way, and it has bothered me ever since we quit talking. We've recently done some communicating, and then all of a sudden, it stopped again. I don't know if I said something wrong, if this person just doesn't like using the website that we've been talking on, if they have decided against wanting to try and reconnect... I just don't know. It drives me nuts when I don't know what is going on. If they want to just go about their business, and decide to call it quits for good ~ I just wish that they would be completely honest about it. Now I keep asking myself... do I just let it go, and if it happens it happens, do I write back again and make another attempt at this whole thing?? What do I do?? I want this person to know that I really care about them, I've been missing them a lot a lot since we stopped talking, and wish that things never happened the way they did. But, I'm afraid to come out and say it for fear of scaring them off, or making myself seem too over zealous in wanting to rekindle a relationship (strictly friendship because I am insanely in love with my husband). GRRRRRR I hate these situations! Any suggestions?? :(
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2 comments:
The fact that you mentioned your happy marriage tells me that this friend is male. While you may be able to keep this friendship pure on your end, he may be struggling with a relationship on his end. If he's married, his wife may not be comfortable with the friendship. Many affairs have begun with online conversations. It may be better to write one more time and suggest that you connect in person with your husband there and let him know that you BOTH would value his friendship. Keep us posted, okay?
Donna,
Yes, you are totally right! The person I am talking about is a guy. He is not married, and is completely unattached. He knows that I am very happily married, and that we have a baby.
It is kind of a touchy situation, I guess. Before things went awry, I thought that he was going to be the one that I would marry. It was definitely the hand of God that kept that from happening. Looking back now, and thinking about everything that went on, I know that we would not have made a good pair as husband and wife.
I don't want him to think that by me wanting to reconnect means that things are going to get weird again with our feelings; because I have no feelings for him other than friendship. But, how do I ask him if that is what's causing him to hesitate again? I don't know if he actually had any feelings for me or not. I thought he did, then his actions and words made me think that there was no possibility of that at all. Which, this is what ended our friendship so many years ago.
I would love nothing more than to get to know him again, and be a semi-part of his life. However, if it is going to cause a weirdness for him then I'm not so sure if I want this that badly. I know for a fact that if we started talking again, there is no way that it would go beyond anything other than friendship. After everything that happened there is no way I could have any other feelings besides friends. I am so blessed to have the husband that I do, and I would never do anything to jeopardize what we have.
Also, do you have a blog or anything that I can contact you with?? If you have a blog, I'd love to see it!! Thanks for the advice!! :o)
~B
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